Charlie the Mac, one time drug dealer, in the village of Fife, has decided to quit his job.
“Ain’t no money ‘ere, guvnor,” he said. “I’m gonna get myself a MBA, and enter investment banking.”
It is a worrying trend, being seen all over the country. Drug dealers, thieves, even bank robbers are turning to investment banking. A bank robber who refused to be named told us “Too risky stealing from the banks. Better to join them, and rob the public.”
Banking certainly seems a good career option for those who like getting rich quick, but not spending any time in prison.… Keep reading.........
Ok children, quiz time. Quiz 1:
1. What is the best time to advertise car insurance to a driver?
a. Keep calling him randomly every month. “Sir, we heard your car insurance is about to expire. Would you like us to sell it to you at inflated prices?”.
b. Advertise? What advertising? Most people use price comparison websites now days, and can find their own god-damn insurance quote.
c. Two days after they buy insurance, start advertising insurance on every website they visit, till they start getting irritated, and feel creeped out at being followed everywhere.
If you chose answer c, congratulations, you have a great future career with Google, Facebook, or anyone of these online advertising companies.… Keep reading.........
Jane Doe (name has been changed to protect her identity. Her actual name is Eliza P Dolittle), was sitting on her computer at work, when she felt strange.
After some time, she realised she was just staring at the computer, without doing or thinking anything. If her boss had walked by, he would have seen her staring intently at the screen, and would have patted himself on the back.
“Good job <insert boss name>, your employees are totally inspired, like this Jane Doe girl here!”
Jane was just sitting there staring into the void. You could have replace her with a mannequin, and it would have done as good as a “job” as her.… Keep reading.........